


For you, always.

by entirely_too_tall



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-16
Updated: 2017-08-16
Packaged: 2018-12-16 05:02:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11821764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/entirely_too_tall/pseuds/entirely_too_tall
Summary: Nursey says "I love you" to everybody and Dex feels that it cheapens the power of those words.





	For you, always.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shellybelle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shellybelle/gifts).



> It's Shelly's birthday yesterday (same as my sister!) and I prompted her on tumblr but as they say, be the creator for the content you want, and I started thinking about it too much so I wrote it at work lol. Happy birthday Shelly, you write fantastic works and I admire them and you so much here's a late present. Hope you like it! 
> 
> Check Please and its characters belong to Ngozi, I am only expanding upon it for our collective non-commercial pleasure.

It started out as one of those “mindfulness” things that he does. Nursey announced on his birthday on his frog year that he was going to start telling everyone “I love you”, and immediately launched into it with enthusiasm in direct opposition to the amount of chill he tries so hard to maintain.

“See you at team breakfast, C. I love you!”

“Nice pass Pointdexter. I love you!”

“Bitty these granola bars are a religious experience, I love you so much!”

“I’m heading out.” “Bye Jack, I love you!”

Chowder loved it, and tried to respond in kind, but doesn’t remember too often. Bitty was used to it, having people shower praises over his cooking. Shitty was ecstatic, as was Ransom and Holster, all of whom began to adopt the habit, though they eventually dropped it as well. Jack and Lardo merely acknowledged it in their usual stoic ways, but Dex, Dex didn’t know what to do whenever he heard it.

See, to Dex, “I love you” is sacred. His parents only say it to each other on their anniversary, to him and his brother on their birthdays. In his whole 19 years, only one other person has whispered it to him, in the park overlooking Portland, the lights of the city shining up while they hide from the world. It was a secret, a twinkling gem handed to him in faith, and which he shattered through his shame and fear of being found out.

So when Dex hears “I love you” again and again, from the lips of his D-man partner, directed at everyone around him, at _him_ , he bristles. How dare Nursey dilute the sanctity of those words with such casual nonchalance, how dare he water down its power, throw it about as if his love, his declarations are worth little more than the air he breathes. It makes Dex angry, makes him flush, makes Nursey grin at his flustering, and makes Dex even angrier.

It continues, it escalates. Nursey slurs out “I love you”s at Kegsters to everyone who dances with him, everyone who takes a shot with him, off him, everyone who even lays a hand on his arm in passing when praising his eyes, flirting with his shirt, teasing at his waist. Nursey is liberal with his verbal professions, and Dex thinks it makes him easy, makes him cheap. Nursey is too good to be cheap.

Maybe because of that, Dex ends up using Nursey Patrol as his excuse to steer Nursey away from these advances, to keep Nursey upright and hydrated and safe. His ministrations earn him endless rivers of confessions from Nursey, “I love you when you dance with me”, “I love it when you bring me water”, “I love you walking me back”, “I love you Dex, I love you”.

At last, one night when Dex himself has had too much to drink himself, when he can’t take Nursey’s pronouncements anymore, as he lays Nursey down in Nursey’s bed, he pleads, “Please don’t say that anymore. You don’t mean it and I can’t handle hearing that when you don’t mean it.”

In that moment, Nursey’s eyes clear up, deep evergreen pools staring back at Dex, as he pushes himself up to reply, “I always mean it, Dex.”

“But how? You say you love everyone. That makes it worth so little when you say it.”

“No, it only means I love everyone as much as I can and I want them to know. Every time I say it, I feel it, this miracle that I am still alive and they are also alive, right next to me, valuable to me in my life, making our lives more magical, just by existing, just by meeting. I mean it all, I mean it all, always.”

Dex tries to see the wonder that Nursey finds, only to fall back to that moonless night on the hill, when the words sparkled and cut. Now, the same words are dimmed and blunt, no more spectacular than a drink of water. “So it’s not special to you, but it’s special to me. I want it to be special to me.”

“You want me to say it like it’s special, or do you want me to say it _to you_ like it’s special?”

Dex tears his gaze away from Nursey’s interrogation. If he’s honest with himself, it’s the latter that he wants. Even if it weren’t special, weren’t just for him, the constant outpouring of “I love you” tumbling from Nursey directed at him had blinded his heart, bound his heart. He _does_ love Nursey, curse the betrayal of proximity, of words, of hope.

“For you, it’s always been special.”

Dex’s head snaps back to face Nursey, shocked, disbelieving.

“Everyone was only practice, the necessary practice so I can learn to love. Because for you, I wanted to learn how to love everything I can love about you. I love how you play, how you work, how you fix things without being asked, how you take care of me. I love you I love you I love you.”

Nursey has stood up and cradled Dex’s face in his hands, entreating Dex to trust his words. Dex, with shaky hands, reach up to curl his fingers around Nurseys, and can only squeeze his tears away, nod away the “are you okay?”, smile in relief. For he’s finally seen the twin gems shining in Nursey’s eyes, and this time he’s ready to accept.

“Can I stay here tonight?” Dex asks.

“Always, Dex. Always.”

They maneuver themselves into the bed, and as Nursey says "goodnight, Dex. I love you", Dex can finally believe it enough to reply for the first time with a blissful sigh before he falls asleep, "I love you too, Nursey. I love you too." 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. Find me on [tumblr](http://ohjustletmewriteinpeace.tumblr.com).


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